Monday, October 5, 2009

On the Perils of Hot Sauce

When I was in a store in New Orleans and saw bottles of hot sauce with labels like "Nuclear Death", I had the sense to avoid them. This piece by Jeremy Clarkson in the UK's The Sunday Times tells what happens to people who aren't so sensible. MP+

The Sunday Times October 4, 2009

Help, quick – I’ve unscrewed the top on a ticking bomb
Jeremy Clarkson

Like any responsible parent, I would not leave a loaded gun in the children’s playroom or keep my painkillers in their sweetie tin. But it turns out that for two years there has been a nuclear bomb in one of my kitchen cupboards, between the tomato ketchup and the Rice Krispies.

It’s an American chilli sauce that was bought by my wife as a joky Christmas present. And, like all joky Christmas presents, it was put in a drawer and forgotten about. It’s called limited-edition Insanity private reserve and it came in a little wooden box, along with various warning notices. “Use this product one drop at a time,” it said. “Keep away from eyes, pets and children. Not for people with heart or respiratory problems. Use extreme caution.”

Unfortunately, we live in a world where everything comes with a warning notice. Railings. Vacuum cleaners. Energy drinks. My quad bike has so many stickers warning me of decapitation, death and impalement that they become a nonsensical blur.

Read the whole piece here.

1 comment:

  1. He's sure got it right about excessive warning signage in the UK- I worked in a cathedral in the North of England, and some of the ceilings in a small spiral staircase to the top of a tower are low. I put signs because people complained they were hitting their heads, but then they started complaining they lost their footing on the stairs because they were busy reading a sign telling them to mind their heads! I think if the English had been the first on the moon, instead of a flag they'd plant a sign saying "Caution Uneven Surfaces" or "Mind the Gap"...

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